Monday, 31 August 2020

Am I even Lucid Now? ;)

Blimey... 



Night started with Malico from story as I'd written about him last yesterday... It was a bit I'd written but another bit too. 


When??? Very confused as didn't know if it was before or after past/future or even if I'd written it yet, or it was still to write...    Then a sharp pain in my head.  

'Now!' lol, ok.. will come back then and I go back to sleep.


Back with Malico & Inka jumping again and twisting dark... like the weaving smoke.... what the hell? 'lol stranger Ren, hall of mirrors as your both the one being and watching.  Rolling and changing' They belong too... feeling and re'membering.


There had been a wired dream also meshed with the other stuff my main dream area in familiarity but it was a huge white ceramic sink but so big it had trees and vegetation growing in it, down the plughole was a basement room, like a house cellar.  


Then the integration which was so wired.... I'm just energy again, polarity spinning like energy but... I know the dream I'd gone back into and it was from years ago with the pirate guy. from June 2016





Was that aspect but integrating it the male there...was like a black/white JD bottle turned yin-yang ball whizzing and spinning and then it was Red, Black and White... then Orange Black and White still with writing on it eventually it was deep purple black and white. I am the spinny ball.   So It's energetic/movement but also visual.

The last dream was of a heated conversation in astral not arguing, but it was animated and energetic people were very passionate... I'm not sure f there even was a location or it was just a meeting of ideas. 

-

Pffffffff   Just found lots more dreams that all fit together.  👀  lol, My brain memory isn't up to the recall... only the patterns. 💜

'Persepective Ren, your in the game... keep playing' ..... lol, insane is what I am 😆  - back to fiction!




____



When I'm free-falling in, and grasping at you.   When I'm chewing threw memories of what we may do,  when time is but now, in the net of what will,  and I'm riding a storm but inside is still.

When love is as formless, as light is a lie and instead I'm surfing my wave of desire.  

Filling the void from which I have come? or bouncing back out as something to become?  

To breath, to beat like a heart or some breath?

Or scatter apart and reach for the net, the limits of being the dissolution of self?   

Indifferent to both I watch and I be, and I wonder again what is me? 



'A walker of boundary a pusher of lines, if there is ever a curtain your looking behind.  

Your fist threw the mirror your head in the frame,  fearless and reckless not troubled by shame.

Not driven by logic you're fueled from within, what is desire? what is sin?'  😈








Hahah sin is my way, Sin is my path 😏 There isn't a god that we can't get passed... God is inside and also without... So I follow desire and fuck off doubt.... 😆 

So the answer is symbols???   'We told you so...All your names mean the same Ren...   there is no where to go!!''

Blugh.... fuck off 😏


Ren.....  That one is new...   It was named from my dog who loved stimpy too ;)


Ren....  That one I'd herd of I knew it ment Name...     lol the fact that my Name name... means almost the same :P

'Your playing a game kid as humanity do, you can own it and play it or forget what is you?    Hahaha  fuck off 😛.............. '😈💜😈'

'You want to die, you want to come home... you always do, yet you ever roam.   You sleep to wake up, you die to begin, your allways upside down bitch, your home is within'

You're within me and without 😏 
'Your fucking echo when you shout... '  lol....   'That's why we team Ren we need one who goes in.... Your our muppet who lets us pull her strings.... Don't try to logic, follow your whim, keep this shit playful that's how we win' 


O.o   'Yep your nuts, ride it ffs ;)   - Don't try to logic this shit, your on earth 😆 ' 



When I'm free-falling in and grasping at you.
When I'm chewing threw memories of what we may do,
When time is but now, in the net of what will,
and I'm riding a storm but inside is still.
When love is as formless as light is a lie and instead I'm surfing my wave of desire.
Filling the void from which I have come? or bouncing back out as something to become?
To breath, to beat like a heart or some breath?
Or scatter apart and reach for the net, the limits of being the dissolution of self?
Indifferent to both I watch and I be, and I wonder again what is me?




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